I have always had problem with my mother for always asking me to help her in household work while my brother gets to sit comfortably at home. I always thought why she is only asking me for help and not my brother. I thought my brother is privileged in all ways. Up until I grew up and understood men have equal or sometimes more struggles, some feminists say women are oppressed by men, in my opinion men too are oppressed by societal pressure for being the perfect man.

They too have struggles which they never speak about because they are never given an option to be emotional, they always have to be strong and apathetic. There are many problems a man faces mentally because of the society. Here is a list of problems man faces in his everyday life which I feel are important to talk about:

1. Expectations

    A man is expected to earn for family, educate themselves according to the family needs and do a job where his parents want him to. Also he is expected to get married just to continue the family blood line, here they are never given a choice to escape the expectations and responsibilities that come with it.

2. Responsibility

      They are considered responsible for the financial matter, if somehow they choose to be a house husband he is mocked by his friends and relatives. He is also considered responsible for well-being of his family and taking care of his parents in their old age while(which is very good) but it is possible that more responsibilities will affect his mental health and here if he takes help from his wife for financial stability he is looked down(mostly prevalent in rural areas). He is also responsible for decisions regarding his family, even when they are confused they have to show up and be authoritative because if they don’t their masculinity is at stake.

3. Body Shamming

      “You are a man you need to be masculine, common get up and don’t cry, don’t run like a girl, haha you call yourself a boy, what kind of a man are you, you still don’t have beard or mustache, your voice is not deep or strong” etc. they have to face it and they can’t talk about it to anyone because no one will understand the feelings a man gets after listening such comments.

4. Freedom of expression

      Well here comes some points which I have already talked about but I feel are important to discuss in details.

If you’re an Indian man you cannot cry, be emotional, show affection or weakness according to your choice. As a male you have to be strong, masculine, intelligent, rich, alpha so that you can solve every problem MEN nearly never have freedom to express, society forces men to be always stoic and strong no matter how they suffer.

5. Gender choice:

      Well no gender in our society is given gender choice but I have normally seen karan Johar movies transgender representation is always observed as a male body playing some dumb character. They’re made fun of in the movies for being transgender or hermaphrodite.

All these problems need to be discussed because we’re all fighting for equality and this will bring equality in mental health of men.

Feminism isn’t a fight against men but it is a fight against patriarchal system where both the gender suffocate and finally because there are only few concern and talking about men’s health and equality in society.

Like an ideal situation for women we have created ideal situation for men that they have to show up without complaining because if they complain people are going to doubt his masculinity.

Here how to solve this

We don’t need to take bigger actions like Rally’s or protests but we have to begin with environment around us.

Let’s tell our fathers, brothers, friends, or all males close to us that you can be strong even if you cry, you are a male despite of your feminine features, you will be what you are and we will never judge you for that because you’re a human first and then a gender i.e. a male.

Here, I Shridevi Bhatt conclude my point of view regarding feminism in our Indian society.

Do read our other blogs thank-you!